Thursday, September 22, 2011

Wings and Things Power Rankings: Week 2

Beef on Weck, at worst the 2nd best grub Buffalo.  In honor of the 2-0 Bills.

1)  Beefcakes -- Timmy's in first place and he has a good team, so he's #1 in the power rankings now.  I took my whoopin' last week thanks to 29 points apiece from Brady and Jahvid Best and 26.6 more from LeSean McCoy.  Epic showdown between two of three 2-0 teams this week, the Beefcakes and Softer Knocks.  Can Timmy hold on to the top spot?

2)  Vlad Ducasse --  The Vlads had another strong showing in a Week 2, 152-150 loss to Dream Shake.  I was all ready to give it to Soom for doubting my ranking prowess, then Will ruined everything by pulling out a comeback win on Monday night.  Unavailable for comment, Soom's publicist issued a statement for Dandyboy, saying of their Week 3 matchup, "if Michael Vick is allowed to play after sustaining a concussion and not practicing all week, you're going down!"

But I don't know about you guys, I am buying what the Amish Rifle is selling.  Ryan Fitzpatrick is making that magic in Buffalo to the tune of 472 yards, seven touchdowns and only one pick through two games, so it'll be up the the gritty bunch from The Estates at Benedict Canyon Woods to knock them back down to earth.

3)  Dream Shake -- Another team with crap quarterbacks that is just getting it done.  The receiver-rich (Megatron, Hakeem, Stevie Johnson and Steve Smith) Dream Shakers are rolling and as long as Matt Forte and Beanie Wells keep up their production, we could see them at 3-0 after facing Kerry Collins and the G-MEN this week.

4)  Kiss the Baby -- Demps made sure to put an end to all that "Jukes may go undefeated" talk with a swift, 195-139 beatdown in the battle of last year's cellar dwellers.  Vincent Jackson let the charge with 36 points and both Ryan Matthews and Peyton Hillis got over 23, but it was a total team effort that his Guy has to be proud of, wherever he is.

5)  G-MEN -- The fantasy G-MEN rebounded from a crappy Week 1 and panic over the QB situation to produce the biggest blowout of the week, a 197-139 win against the preseason power rankings leader, the RI Bulldogs.  (The real life G-Men also won, but predictably looked like crap).  Same story this week, a lot will be riding on Rodgers, Purple Jesus and Miles Austin (38 points last week, but projected for 0 this week on the matchup page as of 12:08 PM EST, is he hurt or something?) to carry the load.

6)  R.I. Bulldogs -- The Bulldogs put up a respectable 139 points against the G-MEN but were no match for Rob Gronkowski (23 points) and Dustin Keller (20).  We saw some weakness in the receiving corps last week as Devin Hester got the start and came away with only 2.45 points.  This week Ty is going Bears heavy with Hester's teammate, Johnny Knox.  The Bulldogs will probably dominate my team this week because they have an exceptional and beefy running back tandem of Michael Turner and Fred Jackson and I have noodle-armed Matt Cassel starting. 

7)  Football Jukes -- 1st-round pick Darren McFadden: stud. Cam Newton: MVP.  Jukes is laughing so hard when he reads the power rankings that say he needs to pay his league dues soon because his team is so sucky.  Cam and Kolb look legit and there is potential greatness for D. Bowe and Jordy Nelson.  Team captain and official running back of the power rankings and the RFH Collective, Maurice Jones-Drew is ready to break out with Gabbert taking over at QB. (Great pickup Will Lyons/you bastard). 

8)  Know-Shon -- Will's squad is laying in the weeds at this spot, just waiting to strike once Arian Foster and Chris Johnson stop playing around and getting only 15 points between them like they did last week.  Kenny Britt is a monster (271 yards and 3 TD's in two games) and since fantasy doesn't count winning big games, Romo and Flacco are good.  An intriguing, evenly-matched matchup with the Football Jukes this week will have big power rankings implications as we begin to see some separation in the standings.

9)  Softer Knocks -- It is not easy to put the 2-0 Knocks this low on the list, but that's what the loss of Jamaal Charles at this point in the season will do to a team.  We can't be surprised if this team rebounds from the loss of its leader behind All-Pro seasons from Mike Wallace and Jeremy Maclin and full health from Matt Stafford, but it's a tall task.  Of course all that could all change with a big showing against the Beefakes.

10) Tomlin's Shape-Up -- The big question is what will happen with Vick.  If he plays, we could see a great matchup with Vlad Ducasse and a potentially major shift in the rankings, not to mention a big rivalry win against Danny.  The big WR's (Andre Johnson, Brandon Marshall, Plax) are key, as is the hulking backfield of Tolbert and Greene. 

11)  #4 Great Teammate -- The Truth is on a bad path right now, the same bad path he went down last year when he lost his first four games.  The difference was that last year he was scoring tons of points and just had bad luck.  This year, he has more points than only my crappy team and needs Philip Rivers and Josh Freeman to pass for 1,000 yards to make up for his questionable wide receivers after Roddy White and inconsistent running back performance from LeGarrette Blount and BenJarvis Green-Ellis.  Big test against Demps this week.

12)  Roger Goodell --  My team stinks.  As noted, a big part of it is that I have started Cassel for two straight weeks, but Mendenhall hasn't taken off yet and my investment in the Falcons has been rewarded, but I need even more.  We don't want to go to 0-3 with a loss to the R.I. Bulldogs, so changes are in order, A.J. Green can't be kept on the bench and Cassel is on notice.


Will Lyons said...

its only a matter of time before mark sanchez brings down the beefcakes

Tim Finkle said...

If I could, I would start that Beef on Weck sandwich as my second QB, damn that's a work of art isnt it? I must say, that #1 spot feels so good. I worked so hard to achieve this level of dominance, even though you guys tried to sabotage me by taking away keepers. My deep draft has allowed me to dominate in spite of my injuries to colsten and steven jackson. The only one in this league that I fear is Football Jukes, he clearly understands what it takes and is a true talent evaluator. I can't leave this comment without mentioning my 2-0 Bills, proving that the 11 year playoff drought was part of our 12 year plan to win it all. Dynasties take time to build. Finally, has anyone watched the Giants lately? Eli Manning is embarrassing the state of NJ. He should give Fitz a call sometime to understand how a real offense should run.

Ty said...

I don't know what happened the last 2 weeks. I was so confident in my line up. All I can say is that if it is possible for my powerhouse team to lose than so can the Patriots this weekend! Go Bills!

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